Oh, April. The month that the gym memberships bought in a January start collecting dust, and the smoothie blender that was going to be the fast food replacement now sits quietly in a cabinet.

Four months ago, I promised myself a “new me” with a solid New Year’s resolution. And now? The “new me” is conveniently nowhere to be seen, along with most of those high-brow resolutions.

The great new year’s resolution betrayal!

New Year’s resolutions never worked for me.

Every December 31st, people get all ambitious —exercise, healthier eating, waking up at 5 AM, taking French, maybe even reading a book without sneaking peeks at my phone every two minutes.

And to what? By February, the gym was half-empty, the croissants were back in the mix, and Duolingo was shaming me into recalling that I’d forgotten it all.

I’ve been here before.

I made the resolutions. I broke them.

And then I felt guilty for breaking them. It’s a familiar cycle: excitement, struggle, failure, and a subdued return to established habit.

So I quit. Not the resolutions, just the ridiculous habit of setting myself up for failure every January.

Why I don’t make new year’s resolutions anymore

Well, yeah, I am not a perfect human being.

I screw up, just like everybody else. But I do my best to learn from it and improve next time.

Which is why I don’t fall for the entire New Year’s resolution thing.

Instead of waking up on Jan. 1st and swearing to be a whole new person (something only seen in spy movies), I focus on gradual progress.

Incremental, tiny changes.

Some days I succeed. Others, I fail.

But the secret is, I don’t give up. No grandstanding, no unnecessary stress, just constant effort.

Motivation: the universe has a peculiar tendency to help

There’s a phrase that I really like and heard if in various versions throughout my life.

It reads: “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

And maybe that’s true.

But the universe is also full of humor. The instant I decide to run, it rains. The day I promise to eat healthily, someone gives me cake. The instant I try to get work done, Netflix releases something perilously worth watching.

And so, I’ve learned to make room for the mess. If it’s worth it to me, I’ll do it. If not, maybe it wasn’t worth doing at all. No guilt, no shame, just an honest evaluation of what I truly desire and what I’m willing to commit to it.

New year’s resolutions vs. actual progress

April is the perfect time to check in—not with resolutions, but with myself. Am I improved from the way I was four months ago?

A little?

A lot?

Doesn’t matter.

Progress is progress.

No need for dramatic changes, but small, repeated steps forward.

New Year’s resolutions might not hold up, but effort does. And that’s what truly matters.

Mark my words.